I am feeling very, very sad today.
One of the ladies on the breast cancer forum I chat on, one who had created a kerfuffle when she posted that her Mastectomy was a 'doddle', has died. She was my age, had a different (more aggressive) breast cancer than me, had the same chemo regime as me, but with mastectomy after the chemo (this is quite common), and shortly after her operation found she had secondary cancers, specifically, in her brain. (FYI: secondaries are breast cancer cells that have spread - it is possible to get another primary cancer which would be entirely unrelated to your original breast cancer)
I spoke about her before in my blog: here and here.
She got pneumonia and was hospitalized on Wednesday. On Friday, she died. Just two months after her secondary cancer diagnosis.
I am also struggling a little bit today as I feel very tired and my eyes are playing up. They feel sore, so I have probably got a tiny bit of face cream in them, which means they are streaming and that in turn makes my eyelids feel sore and puffy, so I generally feel a bit crap. I had been feeling tired on Thursday and had a slightly raised temperature, but this seemed to get better. Then on Friday, I didn't help by going out and having lots of beers with Luke & Greg. We had a laugh, but I have been paying the price of a hangover since then!
I also think that our new diet (which we have only been following for a week) is not helping. The idea was that we would have a bigger lunch and a smaller evening meal. I knew I would struggle to have a bigger lunch as I have no time or inclination to eat a big meal in the day when I am at work. So I had my usual kinds of lunches - soup, sandwich, those Innocent Veg Pots, fruit, yoghurt. And then evening meals this week were things like beans on toast, scrambled egg, tuna sandwich. In essence, I just don't feel like I have been eating properly at all and as a result, my energy levels are struggling.
So I am starting again today and have had fruit, yoghurt and peppermint tea for breakfast, and will have a salad for lunch. I've made a list of meals from my 'Superfoods' book and hope to have the energy to prepare them. Greg and I both suffer from low energy after a day at work, so neither of us wants to cook. We are lazy sods really.
I just feel so different to how I felt at the beginning of this week. I started a beginner running programme last Sunday (run 1 minute, walk 90 seconds, x 8) and tried to do it this morning, but only managed half at a very slow speed. Here's hoping my energy comes back when I start eating properly again. And no more drink!